It’s challenging for most of us to rise above our own excuses and move out of our comfort zone. It can feel impossible to do, and it doesn’t help when self-doubt moves in and clouds our thoughts. However, you can conquer self-doubt and accomplish what you really want in your life.
Living the life you want, doesn’t mean you have to completely abandon all of the things you are comfortable with. After all, you’ve gotten to where you are today, by doing many of those things. The very first step in creating something new for yourself, is recognizing that you have a desire to experience something different and be okay with it. No judgement, just awareness.
When we allow ourselves to dream and think of all the things we want to do, three very common emotions tend to show up, and attempt to throw us off track.
First, the chatter from our inner-critic, weighs in, and convinces us, whatever big idea or thoughts we’re having about creating a change in our lives is crazy, because we aren’t ready, and it’s not worth being uncomfortable.
Second, our ego does a drive-by and reminds us, of all the folks out there who are going to be judging or criticizing our actions, and just like that, creativity and happiness are thrown out the door.
And third, lack of confidence and belief in yourself, will completely blow out any flame of possibility.
Does this sound familiar to you? Inner Critic, ego and lack of confidence are all close-knit family members who want to get in your head, and destroy any effort you make to experience the level of success, happiness and freedom you really want for yourself.
Now that you know you’re likely to have some unwelcome thoughts you can be prepared to conquer them straight away.
6 Ways to Silence Your Inner Critic and Crush Self Doubt
Find a way to disrupt your daily pattern and be okay with it. Consider new and different ideas to accomplishing your goals. Think how disruptive Uber, Netflix & PayPal were to their industries.
For example, if you’re trying to drop a few pounds, it might mean getting up an extra 30 minutes earlier in the morning, so you can work out. Maybe it means partnering with a nutritionist to find out the best ways to reduce your weight and get back in shape.
The first step is aligning your goal with an impact-action that moves you closer to the finish line.
2.Be around people who understand what you want to accomplish and are supportive
Becoming part of a new community can expose you to ideas and resources that you may have never considered before, and you might find that, getting to what you want isn’t nearly as challenging as you may have originally thought. Now is a good time to consider working with a mentor, or hiring a coach. You might consider joining a mastermind, or become a part of an organization. Partnering with the right support can breathe life into your efforts and replace that sense of dread with a sense of possibility.
Leverage the wins that you have already had in your life and know that you are capable. Be willing to give yourself a chance. Connect with yourself and be patient. Small, steady steps, can lead to big progress.
4.Be okay with making a mistake
Making mistakes are normal, and every mistake you make is an opportunity to learn a valuable lesson and to consider what changes need to be made, and what different approaches you can take. Look at your mistakes as directional signals, that are alerting you to go in a different direction, or try a new approach.
5.Be afraid and do it anyway
Don’t let fear get in the way of achieving your goals and living the life that you want. Make space for your fear, know that it’s there, and move forward anyway. Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Big Magic, says Fear, is allowed to have a seat, but not allowed to vote, and not allowed to drive. It’s okay to be afraid, and definitely normal, when you’re trying something new, just do it anyway.
6.Work with a Coach
Working with a coach can help you develop the mindset you need to be successful and get past any blocks that get in your way. Whenever you experience change or try something new, it’s like exercising a muscle you haven’t used, and it can take a little practice and time to get used to. Having support around you can make a huge difference in helping you reach your end goal and live your dream.
This small action will make a huge difference in ensuring that you move forward with the positive changes you want to make in your life.
#1 – I’ve been planning my escape to a bungalow on a beach since I was (well, let’s just say for a long time), and it got even worse, after I saw the movie Blue Crush.
#2- I’m thoroughly addicted to mystery and suspense dramas. I love shows like Dateline, Homeland, Prison Break, 24, Chicago PD……not sure why I hold onto the remote control every minute, finger on the change-channel button, just in case something scary jumps off.
#3- My first name is really Emile (pronounced Emily). It’s my paternal grandmother’s name, and I didn’t even know it, until I was sixteen years old, and needed my birth certificate to apply for my drivers’ license. (ummm….Thanks Mom & Dad for sharing???)
#4- I’m a rule follower, who tends to be very predictable, and I do everything by the book (well, pretty much) until I decided to walk away from my very steady, corporate job, and become an entrepreneur. I’m nine months into running my own executive coaching and leadership consulting business and loving it.
#5- I’m serious about watching what I eat, and on any given day, I’m on a diet. That is, unless, it’s been a really long day, and the golden arches are right in front of me, or the homemade lasagna, is just that good, and I must have seconds.
#6- I cringe whenever I hear “Caribbean Queen (No More Love On the Run), by Billy Ocean. It’s just one of those dang songs where, you can’t get the melody out of your head, even if you wanted to……..”She dashed by me in painted on jeans, And all heads turned, cause she was the dream”…..Oh No!!!
#7- I was mistaken for the late Natalie Cole, not once, but twice – It’s true. Out of 7.5 billion people in the world, two of them (from different places) thought I was the singer, and approached me for an autograph.
#8- I tend to choose men who show up as thoughtful, sweet and kind. The “I’ll do anything for you” type, until football, basketball and baseball season comes around. I have this pattern of choosing men, who LOVE sports, trust me, it’s not a prerequisite, it just happens that way.
#9- I know all the words to the song “Reasons” by Earth, Wind & Fire, and I’m certain, that I should have been a soprano as evidenced by my ability to stay right up there with Philip Bailey.
#10- I truly love being an ontological coach. One of my greatest joys is being able to walk with someone on their journey and offer some insight or inspiration that makes the quality of life, even just a little bit better.
Now it’s your turn. Tell me in the comments, if you can relate to any of the 10 things I mentioned about myself. What do most people not know about you?